Heroin, a love story in angst
by TheBallerina
Summary: this is an original story! aiden is a recovering heroin addict, and is in love with an amazing woman named elliot. he hurts her 1 day & decides that the best way for her 2 have a happy ending is 4 him to be gone. sorta relates to edward and bella.plz R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**Heroin, a love story in Angst.**

And there it was. It was so tempting. How could I just walk away? Could I say no? I've gone for so long with out it… once wouldn't bring me back to were I came from. But what would Elliot say? She's has been so supportive of me since I came back. She would leave. I know she would. But does she have to know?

Looking down at the needle i used to visit so much, i, Aiden Good, was for once at a loss of what to do. It was a war. How do you choose? Today has been the worst day of my life. i got to work, and then the manager of the store Super Shots told me i wasn't 'peppy' enough for there liking and fired me. Would you be happy if you just were released from rehab? I don't think so.

Then when i got home i started yelling at Elliot. What had i done to get an angle? i wasn't worthy. She could do so much better then this. She gave up everything for me. She had a family that loved her; they would have done anything to help her. Her father paid for her tuition, all 180,000 of it. She was smart, well book wise, she got in to Dartmouth. But I could say she wasn't as smart street wise, she was with me. An asshole. A slacker. A recovering heroin addict. I put her through so much… why hasn't she left me? Truly, I don't deserve her.

**Chapter 1 **

I got home and she wasn't there. Work. That's where she was. She was a doctor. She actually did something worth living for. And what did I do? Shoot heroin? Yeah that totally helps people. Almost on cue she walked in the door and gave me one of her priceless smiles. She walked over to give me a hug and kiss and that was when I blew it. After I got the first word out of my mouth the rest just poured out. I couldn't stop. And I let all of my anger rush out at her. She hadn't even said one word to me and I was blaming it all on her. I was blaming her for it all. For my family being gone. For me losing my job. For me doing drugs. I even was heartless enough to blame her for me yelling at her. I said, "Maybe if you were a better person I wouldn't have to talk to talk to you like this." No. maybe if I was a better person I could face the truth. If I was a better person I would let her go. She wouldn't have to put up me anymore.

After I yelled at Elliot I ran out of the apartment we shared. It was a big apartment. I tried to help her out with the money stuff, but my job paid 6.25 for an hour of taking pictures of phony assholes with fake smiles.

I went to an old buddy of mine. I use to be good friends with him before I met Elliot. She helped me dump friends that were only holding me back from my 'full potential'. What was she talking about? I was always going to be a failure. My buddy Chris and I did some not so legal things that Elliot didn't like. I knew she got upset when she heard about them. She always can tell if I did any drugs, or drank any alcohol. I don't know how she does, but she can.

When I called him he was totally game for meeting up at the local club. I started walking toward that general direction. The street was crowded like it always was in New York. I just followed the flow of the crowd. It was only seven. I was going to meet Chris at eight so I had plenty of time to waste.

I kept walking. I didn't want to stop because then I would think. And then I would probably start crying about the two biggest things on my mind; my one and only love, and my urge to shoot some heroin.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 **

My mind kept wandering about all I could do to make it up to Elliot. Then it came to mind. I would leave. She could move on with her life and never have to worry about a mother fucker like me. I would move in with my only family member I had left, my sister lily. She was only in Newark, it wasn't that far away. I would leave tonight. Forget about Chris, he was only going to lead me to trouble.

I started to make my way back to Elliot. It was going to be a clean break, I would tell her she could do so much better then me and that I wasn't going to hold her back anymore. I wont tell her where I was going, or who I'd be staying with. It would be better for her. It will be the best thing to happen in her life. And the worst in mine.

God, I was going to miss her. Her smile. Her laugh. The way she cuddled with me at night. The times when I would hold her as she slept and think of what a lucky bastard I was as I played with her gorgeous hair. It was a strange cross between a light brown and faded red. She was always so small compared to me. Elliot was about five feet three, and barely made it to my shoulder. If you ever looked into those piercing green eyes you could tell she was strong. She was a fighter.

I was walking slowly now. I was trying to take all the time in the world to get Elliot and my place. Well now it was just Elliot's place. I reached the building all too soon. All I could do to keep from breaking down was think about putting one foot in front of the other, and not about the fact that I was about to leave the love of my life. Ever since I first saw Elliot I have never even thought about another woman. And I never will.

There was the door. Right in front of me was the last thing standing in the way of Elliot and me. I looked at my watch, it was already eleven. Fuck. I had been out longer then I thought. Well now's a good enough time then never. If she is already asleep ill just write her a note and go. God I hope she was asleep. I slowly turned the key. And pushed the door open, trying to be as quite as I could. I stepped in to the apartment and saw all the lights on, but no Elliot.

I hurried in. not bothering to lock the door because I knew I would be leaving soon. I went straight to the bedroom we shared. God this would be the last time I saw my love. It hurts too much to even comprehend. I turned the knob to the door and there she was lying on top of the blankets, in all of her clothes. She must of fallen asleep waiting for me. Jesus I was a fucker. To just leave and not say good bye. I went into the closet and took out a duffle and shoved in a small amount of clothes, and then the few random things I would need. Putting the duffle on my shoulder I was about to walk out the door, and out on her, when I did the worst thing I could do. I looked back.

She was curled up in a ball sleeping on the bed. She looked so cold and small I quietly went back to her and shifted the covers over her. She groaned in her sleep. Fuck! Now I have to say this to her face! I can't do it… it'll kill me.

"Aiden…? I'm so sorry….I just…" her voice was still groggy from sleep.

"Shush…go back to sleep my love. I'm sorry for everything Elliot." I said with deep regret and love. Her lids were heavy and she drifted back into a place where I couldn't hurt her.

Quickly I ran to the kitchen and wrote down my last words to my darling.

Dear Elliot,

I'm sorry I was such an ass. Through our whole our whole relationship all I've done to you was hold you back from true happiness. All I want you to have is a happy life. You took my heart away the first time I saw you. And that's where it will stay. Ill never look at any one else for the rest of my life.

You deserve so much better then this.

Love forever and always,

**Aiden **

I looked at the words. She deserved an explanation in person. But I just couldn't face her. I put the letter on the night stand. And got out of that building as fast as I could.

RUN. That's what I my mind was thinking. I can't stand to be near her anymore. If I were to stay I would be unable to let her go. This was going to kill me, but I just want her to be able to have a happily ever after. And if that was with out me, so be it. The thing that I have to stop thinking about is that some other guy will hold her, will love her. That's the worst part of all. I'm such a selfish person.

Finally some fresh air. I can't breathe. This is worse. I can't smell her. So I started to run. Fast. I wasn't going to stop until I reached the train station. One block I was still going, two blocks I was still going, three blocks I started to slow, four blocks I was proud that my lungs were still inflated, five blocks and I was on my knees.

And then the tears started. They wouldn't stop. It hurt so badly. And I wasn't talking about my lungs. I broke my own heart. But I did it to save dome one else's. I did it to save the only one that could fix my heart. I was broken. I was beyond repair.


End file.
